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JAFO
Member
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Posted: Wed Aug 18th, 2004 05:08 pm |
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JOB APPLICATION
NAME: John Kerry
RESIDENCE: 7 mansions, including Washington DC, worth multi-millions.
EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE:
Law Enforcement. I voted to cut every law enforcement, CIA and defense
bill in my career as a US Senator.
I ordered Boston to remove a fire hydrant in front of my mansion, thereby endangering my neighbors in
the event of fire.
MILITARY:
I used three minor injuries to get an early discharge from
the military and service in Vietnam (as documented by the attending
doctor).
I then returned to the US, joined Jane Fonda in protesting
the war, and insulted returning Vietnam vets, claiming they committed
atrocities and were baby killers.
I threw my medals, ribbons, or something away in protest. Or did I?
My book; Vietnam Veterans Against the War: The New Soldier shows how I truly feel about the
military.
COLLEGE:
I graduated from Yale University with a low C average.
Unlike my counterpart George Bush, I have no higher education and did not get
admitted to Harvard nor graduate with an M.B.A
PAST WORK EXPERIENCE:
I ran for U.S. Congress and have been there ever since.
I have no real world experience except marrying rich women and running HJ Heinz
vicariously through my wife Teresa.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS:
As a US Senator I set the record for the most liberal voting record,
exceeding even Ted Kennedy and Hillary Clinton.
I have consistently failed to support our military and CIA by voting against budgets, thus
gutting our country's ability to defend itself.
Although I voted for the Iraq War, now I am against it and refuse to admit that I voted for
it.
I voted for every liberal piece of legislation.
I have no plan to help this country but I intend to raise taxes significantly if I am
elected.
My wealth so far exceeds that of my counterpart, George Bush, that he
will never catch up.
I make no or little charitable contributions and have never agreed to pay any voluntary excess taxes in MA, despite family wealth in excess of $ 700 million.
I (we) own 28 manufacturing plants (Heinz) outside of the U.S. in
places like Asia, Mexico and Europe.
We can make more profit from the cheaper cost of labor in those Countries, although I Blame George Bush
for sending all of the jobs out of Country.
Although I claim to be in favor of alternative energy sources, Ted
Kennedy and I oppose windmills off Nantucket and Martha's Vineyard as
it might spoil our view of the ocean as we cruise on our yachts.
RECORDS AND REFERENCES:
None.
PERSONAL
I ride a Serotta Bike.
My Gulfstream V Jet I call The Flying Squirrel.
I call my $850,000 42-foot Hinckley twin diesel yacht the "Scarmouche".
I am fascinated by rap and hip-hop and feel it reflects our real
culture.
I own several "Large" SUVs including one parked at my Nantucket summer
mansion, though I am against large polluting inefficient vehicles and
blame George Bush for the energy problems.
PLEASE CONSIDER MY EXPERIENCE WHEN VOTING IN 2004.
I will consider you Mr Kerry...........then cast my vote for President Bush !!!!!!!!!!!
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Yellow Dog Democrat
Member
| Joined: | Wed Jul 28th, 2004 |
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| Posts: | 5756 |
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Offline
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Posted: Wed Aug 18th, 2004 07:34 pm |
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Nice try,this one is so off the wall you can't even get Republicans to cheer you on.
There's way too much garbage in this to bother to respond to all of it.Some it's too outrageous and and some of it's just down-right stupid.I'll respond to some and move on to something worthwhile.
Education and Experience:Check his Senate voting record,you're simply all washed up on this one.
Military: his records have pretty much been an open book.Why don't you lay them down beside G.Bushes and see which is more complete.
You must have confused Kerry with Bush on the grades at Yale.Bush's GPA was 1.98.Not high enough to get Bush into Law School.John Kerry went to Boston College(no further education?)and received a Law Degree.
Past work experience.(I ran for Congress and have been there ever since?)
No other jobs?
John Kerry worked as a Public Prosecutor, and Lt Governor of the State of Massachusetts.I guess his constituents saw his resume of success suitable enough to elect him as a U.S. Senator.Yes he's been in the "Senate" ever since.
Go to Urban Legends and read the truth about his wifes wealth and actual amount of "ownership" of Heinz Factories.
Keep in mind when you do that she inherited her shares of ownership from her first husband."Republican" Senator John Heinz.
Shame***Shame**Shame****
Shame on you for posting it,shame on those that believed it.
This is real garbage.
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Bill M
Member
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Posted: Wed Aug 18th, 2004 07:38 pm |
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Yellow Dog Democrat wrote: Nice try,this one is so off the wall you can't even get Republicans to cheer you on.
There's way too much garbage in this to bother to respond to all of it.Some it's too outrageous and and some of it's just down-right stupid.I'll respond to some and move on to something worthwhile.
Education and Experience:Check his Senate voting record,you're simply all washed up on this one.
Military: his records have pretty much been an open book.Why don't you lay them down beside G.Bushes and see which is more complete.
You must have confused Kerry with Bush on the grades at Yale.Bush's GPA was 1.98.Not high enough to get Bush into Law School.John Kerry went to Boston College(no further education?)and received a Law Degree.
Past work experience.(I ran for Congress and have been there ever since?)
No other jobs?
John Kerry worked as a Public Prosecutor, and Lt Governor of the State of Massachusetts.I guess his constituents saw his resume of success suitable enough to elect him as a U.S. Senator.Yes he's been in the "Senate" ever since.
Go to Urban Legends and read the truth about his wifes wealth and actual amount of "ownership" of Heinz Factories.
Keep in mind when you do that she inherited her shares of ownership from her first husband."Republican" Senator John Heinz.
Shame***Shame**Shame****
Shame on you for posting it,shame on those that believed it.
This is real garbage.
There sure was a lot you left out.
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Evil Conservative
Member
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Posted: Wed Aug 18th, 2004 07:39 pm |
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JOHN FORBES KERRY, "MAN OF THE PEOPLE"
CAREER OBJECTIVE
President of the United States, Renter of the Lincoln bedroom,
Intern Supervisor, Commander and Chief and Defender of the Working
Man, I mean Person
EDUCATION
Educated at Swiss Boarding Schools -- because my parents did not
like me that much
Attended elite private schools like Fessenden School in West
Newton, Massachusetts and St. Paul's in New Hampshire -- just
like your kids
Graduated Yale University, 1966 (I am much smarter than that Bush
guy -- oh, wait, he also went to Yale.)
Graduated Boston College Law School in 1976 (I am much smarter
than that Bush guy -- oh, wait, he got an MBA from Harvard.)
VIETNAM MILITARY SERVICE
Served as an officer on a swiftboat in the Mekong Delta in
VIETNAM for three long months -- tried my best to come home a
hero like JFK after his service on PT-109. I was in VIETNAM --
VIETNAM was a place where I was for a while. Did I mention that
VIETNAM veterans love me?
I collected three Purple Hearts in my three months (had to get
three in order to come home and run for Congress as a hero like
JFK) and the last one for that scratch on my finger -- it REALLY
did hurt! It was important to have the right connections so I
could get home and run for Congress on my hero status like JFK --
he was not in VIETNAM, but I was.
Brought my own motion camera to make sure images of me in VIETNAM
becoming a hero made it back home to the states. Got a free trip
home after three months on my swiftboat where I suffered severe
injuries and collected three Purple Hearts (did I mention that),
a Bronze and Silver Star for heroism -- ensuring my destiny as
a hero and man of the people like JFK.
Got home and found out they were not bestowing hero status on
war heroes like me, so I threw my medals, or was it my ribbons,
over the White House fence. Maybe it was someone else's medals.
Co-founder of the VIETNAM Veterans of America and spokesperson
for the VIETNAM Veterans Against the War and worked closely with
Jane Fonda to make sure everyone knew that all the guys in VIETNAM
were war criminals -- I was too, and even testified before the
Senate about my own war crimes.
"Represented" my cadre of anti-American misfits in a Paris meeting
to discuss how we could better provide "aid and comfort" for
the North Vietnamese and to discuss the unconditional surrender
of the U.S. In doing so, I knowingly, directly violated UCMJ
Article 104 part 904, and U.S. Code 18 U.S.C. 953.
Did I mention that this meeting, and my other anti-American
activities, also put me in violation of the Constitution's Article
three, Section three, which defines treason as "giving aid and
comfort" to the enemy in time of warfare.
Consequently, I stand subject to the Constitution's Fourteenth
Amendment, Section 3, which states, "No person shall be a Senator
or Representative in Congress, or elector of President and
Vice-President...having previously taken an oath...to support
the Constitution of the United States, [who has] engaged in
insurrection or rebellion against the same, or given aid or
comfort to the enemies thereof."
But I don't have to resign -- I am understudy to Teddy Kennedy,
now the patriarch of JFK's family.
I topped off my coddling of Commies by authoring a book called The
New Soldier -- but since military heroes are back in vogue, I now
sue anyone who reproduces the cover of that book on any website,
especially a website like http://kerry-04.com/. (The cover picture
is a mockery of the Iwo Jima flag raising -- you can see it at
http://kerry-04.com/ until my lawyers get them to take it down.)
NOTE: Please join fellow Patriots and sign the
petition demanding John Kerry's resignation. Link to --
http://www.PatriotPetitions.US/Kerry (If you don't have Web access,
please send a blank e-mail to: <sign-Kerry@PatriotPetitions.US>
Each e-mail sent to this address will be counted as one signature
for the petition.)
CONGRESSIONAL "SERVICE"
Volunteered as a campaign worker for my mentor, Teddy Kennedy
in 1962. I just love that big lug!
My first campaign for Congress was in 1972 -- I was a war
hero like JFK but nobody noticed so I ran on my anti-American
platform. I won the primary with a little help from my campaign
manager (brother Cameron) who broke into my opponents campaign
headquarters. Unfortunately, because of that Watergate thing,
I lost the general election to a Republican even after spending
more than any other Congressional campaign in the nation.
In 1982, with the help of Uncle Teddy, I got elected as lieutenant
governor for governor Michael Dukakis -- then got elected to the
Senate in 1984 -- it has been smooth sailing ever since.
I have dedicated the last 20 years, between wives and vacation
homes, promoting big government spending (except in defense and
intelligence, which I vote against every chance I get), class
warfare, the welfare state and general wealth redistribution, any
kind of abortion on demand (without parental consent for minors),
and obstructionist tactics in the judicial nominee process.
According to Americans for Democratic [sic] Action, a far-left
watchdog group, I have a higher lifetime liberal voting record
at 93% than Ted Kennedy with 88%
I am the ranking Democrat member of the Committee on Small Business
and Entrepreneurship. My current millionaire wife is heiress of
the Heinz Ketchup fortune -- a "small" business
Ranking member of the Hispanic Task Force, even though I "borked"
Miguel Estrada
Chaired the Senate Democratic Leadership Steering and Coordination
Committee
In 1987, teemed up with Teddy to get an override of presidential
veto of Boston's Big Dig Boondoggle -- one of the most larded
distributions of taxpayer largess in U.S. history.
In 1991 the Senate created the Select Senate Committee on POW/MIA
Affairs to investigate the possibility that U.S. prisoners of
war and soldiers designated missing in action were still alive
in Vietnam. Acting as chairman, I helped persuade the group to
vote unanimously that no American servicemen still remained in
Vietnam. In doing so, I helped begin the process of normalizing
U.S.-Vietnamese relations.
Wealthiest senator ("man of the people"), with an estimated net
worth of nearly $200 million (that's $800 million if you combine
it with my current wife's assets)
POLITICAL POSTURING AND ACCOMPLISHMENTS:
ABORTION
Voted to federally fund abortions
Voted against parental consent for minors
Voted against ban on Partial Birth Abortion (3 times)
Voted against ban on sending money to UN population fund --
the money was sent to pay for China's forced abortion and
sterilization policy
Have been warned by Catholic clergy that I will not be served
communion due to my stance on this issue
NARAL lifetime rating of 100%; National Right to Life
Committee lifetime rating of 0%
DEATH PENALTY
Oppose federal and/or state death penalty (except for innocent
unborn children -- see above)
Voted against death penalty for terrorists
Voted against death penalty for drug-related murders
TAXES & ECONOMICS
I like high taxes and want to raise them
Voted against all three Bush tax cuts & want to repeal them
Voted for 1993 Clinton tax hike (largest in history)
Voted against major tax relief packages at least 10 times
Support re-raising taxes on the wealthy to redistribute money
for healthcare and education -- i.e., Socialism
Claim I can stop outsourcing and create 10 million new jobs in
four years, despite the fact that there are only about 8
million unemployed people in the U.S.
Want to raise the minimum wage, which will result in
outsourcing and the loss of jobs Voted at least 5 times
against balanced budget amendments
Voted at least 5 times to raid the Social Security Trust Fund
Believe Washington manages your money better than you could
Lifetime rating of 26% from Citizens Against Government Waste
MILITARY & NATIONAL SECURITY
We don't need a military, per se
Favor UN control of remaining U.S. Troops
Voted for 7 major reductions in military funding
Voted against Gulf War I (1991)
Voted for Gulf War II -- but then criticized and voted against
military appropriation for troops
Voted against MX missile, Trident Submarine, SDI (Strategic
Defense Initiative -- Star Wars), and the B-1 and B-2 Stealth
Bomber/Fighter
Supported slashing $2.6 billion from intelligence funding
while serving as a member of Senate Intelligence Committee
SECOND AMENDMENT
Against
Have earned a lifetime rating of 0% from the National Rifle
Association
FAITH & VALUES
Against/Don't have any
Voted Against Defense of Marriage Act
Favor civil unions for homosexuals until marriage is popular
enough to support
Voted to extend hate crimes protections to homosexuals
Voted against voluntary school prayer
Voted against ban on human cloning and support embryonic
stem-cell research
EDUCATION
Voted against voucher pilot program
Voted against approving a school-choice pilot program
Support racial profiling and preference for admission to
universities, known as "affirmative action"
JUDGES, COURTS & LAW
Against racial profiling and preference when dealing with
terrorism
Voted against confirmation William Rehnquist as Chief Justice
of the Supreme Court
Voted against confirmation of Robert Bork and Clarence Thomas
to the Supreme Court
Only support activist judges who will support abortion,
persecute Christians and rewrite the Constitution
Voted against confirmation John Ashcroft as U.S. Attorney
General
Voted against punitive damage limits in products liability
cases
As Michael Dukakis' Lt. Governor from 1983-1985, supported
granting prison furloughs to hundreds of Massachusetts inmates
FOREIGN POLICY
Against linking Most Favored Nation status to China's human
rights record
Voted for Kyoto Protocol on Environment that exempted major
Third World polluters, while creating an unfair burden on
American taxpayers
Supported Iraq regime change as late as January 2003, but not
anymore
Support unilateral nuclear freeze
Support submitting completely to the UN, as well as the
International Criminal Court, taking all sovereignty away
from the U.S. and its citizens
Don't know what the Geneva Conventions say, mean or who
they apply to
OTHER QUALIFICATIONS
Five multi-million dollar mansions
A large multi-million dollar yacht
Many "American" cars, including several gas-guzzling SUVs, which
I am opposed to politically
Personal 757 campaign jet
Access to unlimited condiments -- did I mention my current
millionaire wife is heiress to the Heinz fortune
Have dual citizenship in France
REFERENCES
General Vo Nguyen Giap -- most celebrated military hero of NORTH
VIETNAM, where I served
"Hanoi Jane" Fonda
Teddy Kennedy
John F. Kennedy -- we have the same initials
Howard Dean -- (Albert Gore by proxy)
Dan Rather, Tom Brokaw and Peter Jennings
"Foreign Leaders" who I am unable to name at this time
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Joe Butler
Guest
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Posted: Wed Aug 18th, 2004 07:42 pm |
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| Actually his aunt paid for his education because his parents couldn't afford it. Where do you people get this crap from? Last edited on Wed Aug 18th, 2004 07:43 pm by
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BUSHALLTHEWAY
Member
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Posted: Wed Aug 18th, 2004 07:52 pm |
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I think he pulled it out of Kerry's A$$!!!! Actually isn't that the same place you pull your crap from?![[usa]](/forums/themes/default/usa.gif) ![[allamerican]](/forums/themes/default/allamerican.gif) BUSH/CHENEY 2004
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Yellow Dog Democrat
Member
| Joined: | Wed Jul 28th, 2004 |
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| Posts: | 5756 |
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Posted: Wed Aug 18th, 2004 08:11 pm |
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I guess you could say I left any "lies" out of it.
Can you say the same of the posting I responded too?
Hey Evil,
Masters Programs don't generally require as high an academic standing for admission as Doctorates of Law Programs.
I know a few Lawyers,I don't know any that got into Law School with a 1.98 GPA.
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MikeG.
Member
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Posted: Wed Aug 18th, 2004 08:25 pm |
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Conservative reactions...
Wealthy Republican - "He is hard working, self-sufficient, and a true American. It is ok for him to not advocate the will of the people, because he is above them"
Wealthy Democrat - "He is a liar, and a cheater. He makes a lot of money yet advocates for taxes? He must be a hypocrite. I do not understand that the world does not revolve around me. We can not let this man lead our nation"
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Yellow Dog Democrat
Member
| Joined: | Wed Jul 28th, 2004 |
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Posted: Wed Aug 18th, 2004 09:11 pm |
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Hey Mike,
I just heard Texas can secede"Legally".If they take Bush maybe we'll be ok?
Man I'm starting to get sarcastic again.
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MikeG.
Member
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Posted: Wed Aug 18th, 2004 09:13 pm |
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Yellow Dog Democrat wrote: Hey Mike,
I just heard Texas can secede"Legally".If they take Bush maybe we'll be ok?
Man I'm starting to get sarcastic again.
Haha yes...get rid of Texas, and switch to a popular vote electoral system, and we'd be all set!
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